Gardasil: The Worst Thing That Ever Happened to Me

November 5, 2013

SANEVAX – My name is Julie and I am 26 years old. I have remained fairly quiet since being vaccinated by Gardasil because talking about the damage it has done is very difficult.

The pain inside that it has caused is so extreme that it has been easier for me to try to forget Gardasil ever existed.  For the past two years, I have tried to pretend that my life was not stolen from me and to forget that I was poisoned. Unfortunately, I can’t forget because every day I am reminded when I wake up that I am living a real-life nightmare. I have chosen to speak out because every day I learn of another girl suffering unexplainable health problems.  Her diagnosis is to be told she is crazy or that there is no way to help her. What is the link between me and thousands of these girls? Gardasil.

Julie-2013-01 (2)I see a stranger when I look back to the girl I was before Gardasil. This vaccination literally changed my life in every single way possible. In some ways, I’m glad that I’m not that same girl. I now have more appreciation for those who deal with debilitating health issues. Instead of passing by someone in a wheelchair without a second thought, I say hello and then I cry. I cry because I know the struggles they go through, and I cry because I know how few others show that they care. I have learned who my true family and friends are.  I have also learned the value of researching the truth and not instinctively trusting medicine. Mostly, I have learned the true value of health because without it we have nothing. Other than those few things, I am extremely saddened that the girl I used to be was stolen from me. I was once a very healthy and active girl, full of energy. I was a personal trainer and loved all things associated with health and fitness. I yearned to do anything outdoors and all that is adventurous. I was a free spirit who craved the beauty of life in every way.  At the age of 23, I had many dreams and was excited for the future.


On March 26, 2011, still at age 23, I went to the doctor for a sinus infection. At that time, he thought it would be wise to give me the Gardasil and Tetanus vaccine. Immediately afterwards, I had my regrets because I felt strange, and I realized it did not make sense to get vaccinated while my immune system was already busy fighting a sinus infection. I remember calling my mom, scared and crying, that something bad had happened – I guess my intuition was right. In the days following the shots, I developed extreme fatigue. It became difficult to perform daily tasks. I was lightheaded all of the time and blacked out often. I also developed pelvic pain, nausea, vomiting, loss of appetite and a 30lb weight loss within two months. It became difficult for me to perform well at my job as a personal trainer because I constantly felt like I had the flu. I called in to work sick often because I thought that I actually was battling something like the flu. By July, things escalated very quickly. I had severe chest pain that shot all the way down my left arm and heart arrhythmias. I had three episodes where my whole body tingled and went numb. By this point, I knew I had something serious, but I could have never imagined how serious it was going to get.


August 6th, 2011 I woke up in bed and went to stand up…and I fell to the ground. On the ground, I realized I was unable to move my left leg. A few days later, the same thing happened to my right leg. Both of my legs were paralyzed and I was unable to stand or walk. I was admitted to the hospital where I stayed for 10 days. I was tested in every way imaginable with two spinal taps, CT scans, MRIs of the brain and spine, an echocardiogram, an abdominal scan and tons of blood work. Doctors were unsure what I had – so I was treated with a high dose of steroids and then sent home in no better condition than when I arrived. By September, I woke up unable to move anything below my head – besides my right arm. I was paralyzed from the neck down.  We went to another emergency room where I stayed for a week. I went through more extensive testing and was once again told by doctors that they did not know what I had. They set me up as an outpatient with a neuromuscular specialist and discharged me again in no better condition than when I arrived.

This was the beginning of my two year journey with specialists. I have now seen countless neurologists, a neuromuscular specialist, multiple rheumatologists, an infectious disease specialist, a neuroimmunologist and a neurophysiologist. The only discoveries so far have been a positive Rheumatoid Factor, positive ANA Titer, elevated SED rate and elevated CK – all tests pointing to inflammation in my body and that my immune system is not functioning correctly. In addition to these positive tests, I also was diagnosed with an overactive sphincter. Why would a once healthy 23 year old all of the sudden develop an overactive bladder along with unexplainable neurological problems if there was no root cause?

The rheumatologists and neurologists bounced me back and forth to each other for quite a while – each specialty claiming the other specialty would be more capable of diagnosing. Finally, I had a rheumatologist and a neurophysiologist work together to try and help me. The neurophysiologist and rheumatologist suspected transverse myelitis based on examination and my symptoms that showed an upper motor neuron problem. They explained that the inflammation that shows on my tests is most likely coming from damage to my brain and/or spinal cord. I was told there is nothing to do about this except time. To this day, none of my damage or symptoms can be explained.


My symptoms since the Gardasil vaccination are: Paralysis, gait disturbances, paresthesia, hypersensitivity to sound and touch, whole-body shakes, tremors, stiffness and pain in joints, feet and hands turning purple and blue, adrenal insufficiency, endocrine problems, weight loss, nausea, vomiting, hyperventilation, uncontrollable laughing or crying, low blood sugar, sensitivity to smell and chemicals, hot/cold intolerance, loss of appetite, pelvic pain, overactive bladder, chest pain, chest palpitations, shortness of breath, swollen glands, memory loss and memory gaps, confusion, hair loss, lightheadedness, blackouts, and a fatigue so extreme that it is hard to do simple daily tasks.

My physical symptoms have been tough to deal with, but the emotional and mental turmoil that all of this has put me through has been even harder to deal with. The once free spirit is now afraid of life. I’m afraid that if I drive, I may fall asleep at the wheel because of how confused and fatigued I can get. I’m also afraid to drive or be alone because my legs may stop working.  I’m afraid of going to any social events or traveling because of germs. I get sick at a minimum of once a month with a cold or virus, and every time I get sick it sets my progress back at least a month.  I was once very independent, but I am now completely dependent on my husband. I was once full of energy but now I fatigue taking a shower. The girl who once craved adventure and anything outdoors is now afraid to go outside due to newly developed severe allergies. When I get allergies, it flares up my already overactive immune system, and all of my symptoms come on stronger.

That is not even the most painful part.  The most difficult and painful thing to deal with is to think about all of the things I could be doing with my life if I were not ill. Maybe I would have finished school, started my own personal training business, or even started a family with my husband. I watch everyone else live out their lives while I sit at home sick every day.  Some people are making their dreams come true, and, unfortunately, some are wasting the precious gift they were given. I crave life every day, but I am unable to live it right now because of how fatigued and weak I am. Gardasil has placed me in a jail inside my own body. I no longer dream of the future because I don’t know if my body will ever allow me to make those dreams come true.


As I fight to get better, I can’t count how many times I have been told that I don’t look sick. I just choose to not show the ugly side of the illness to most. I can assure you that I suffer daily along with thousands of other girls. We are alone because we are not understood. We all suffer in silence because we are told that we do not look sick, that there is no way to help, it’s in our heads, or we come across those that don’t even want to hear or believe us because we do not have a “label” to our illness. I, along with many others, have lost friendships during the time I needed friends the most. Some family relationships have even become strained due to lack of understanding. Those I have met after I got sick will never know the real me trapped under illness. My husband has not even gotten to experience life with the woman he knows he married. He spends his days taking care of me instead of living newlywed bliss. Gardasil stole that from us.


Today I eat, breath and sleep focused on trying to heal.  I live in a bubble to make sure that nothing sets me back from my progress so that one day I may have a future. The only type of specialist that has helped me practices natural and functional medicine. My strict diet and supplement program has helped me to walk again after two years in a wheelchair, but I still struggle with many symptoms daily. In January of 2014, I plan to work with a Homeopath to detox the vaccine out of my system with CEASE therapy.

I chose to share my story after two years because I can no longer sit back and watch beautiful lives be destroyed by something that was meant to protect. I can only hope and pray that all of this happened to me for a reason. If my story has not convinced you or someone else against the shot, I hope at least I have convinced you to do more research before making that choice. The research will speak for itself. My story is my reality because I was not warned and I did not research. I hope and pray that this story finds you in time to protect yourself or your loved ones from the Gardasil vaccination.

By Julie Davidson, Fort Worth Texas